I hate the #YesAllWomen tag
Firstly, I’ve actually read Elliot Rodger’s “manifesto” (it’s really more of a life story) and I don’t believe he was only a misogynist. He was that, but he was also a hate filled person who was unable to see the value of anyone unless they were of use to him. At one point in his story, he talks about needing to repress jealousy and anger toward his five year old brother (he was in his twenties at this point) because the brother was more gregarious and made friends more easily than he did. He felt resentment toward ANYONE who he perceived had a better life than he did. That shooting was not only about women.
Secondly, I simply do not fear men that much. Sure, I’ve been harassed, and I’ve been touched without permission. The most I’ve ever felt at this was annoyance and irritation while I made the men who tried it aware that it was unacceptable. Perhaps it’s because I’m tall, or because I’m (apparently) intimidating. When I see a strange man, even if I’m alone at night or travelling on the train, I don’t automatically reach for my keys “just in case”. Perhaps I’m naive. But that hashtag does not represent me and I resent that people try to say it represents every woman’s experience or opinion.
I think feminists should educate others
A lot of feminists like telling people to “educate yourself”. It usually comes off as condescending bullshit from someone who likes feeling superior to others. Yet feminists say they wish to change the world.
Now, I know the rhetoric about how politeness never changed anything, but I’m pretty sure the people who changed the world didn’t walk around being condescending fucks and telling people to educate themselves. I think they were the kind of people who empowered people through their teachings.
I think the feminist definition of sexism is stupid
sexism = prejudice + power
I don’t have a problem with this as a concept, but I think calling it “sexism” is simply a disingenuous way of silencing men.
The fact is, on a case by case basis, anyone can be discriminated against on the basis of anything about them regardless of whether there’s institutionalised power to back that up. Men can be discriminated against on the basis of their gender and that is still sexism.
It may not be as big of a problem for them and it may not cause as big an impact in their life, but pretending it’s not a problem or that it’s not possible (I know that’s not how this equation was originally intended, but some people actually interpret it that way) doesn’t help anyone.
I think benevolent sexism is bullshit
Because there is no such thing as sexism against men, right? So anything that seems sexist against men is really about women. Thus, benevolent sexism.
Which is more likely, that “benevolent sexism” is a thing, or that our society with its rigid gender roles punishes both women and men for straying outside of those boundaries?
“What about the menz” really pisses me off.
Feminists who want to shut men up use this phrase. It’s their shorthand for telling men they’re talking about women and to STFU. Sometimes, they will encourage these men to “create a space for yourselves” if they want to talk about men’s issues.
Some men do that. Then those spaces are inundated with feminists accusing them of being misogynists or MRAs and not respecting feminism enough. That’s really rude (not that feminists care) but it’s also incredibly illogical. They are doing what you suggested.
I like my privilege
Not only that, I think everyone else should like their privilege, too.
That isn’t the same thing believing it’s okay to use your privilege to oppress others. Obviously that’s wrong. It isn’t the same thing as not wanting to deconstruct privilege (if that’s even possible; I’m not sure it is).
But, so long as privilege is a thing that I have, I’m going to be grateful for it and I’m going to use it to my advantage. It would be stupid of me not to.
I’m one of those girls
You know the ones. All my friends are male and I think women are drama-queens. Obviously not all women, but most of them, yes. Especially feminists. It’s like they take all life’s little problems and then turn it up to eleven.
I feel bad for women who’ve had hard lives, but the thing is, most people have had hardship in their lives. Being a woman doesn’t make your hardship any more special.